BOOM Go the Resolutions!

Caution: New Years Resolutions may combust!

It’s that time of year again, a time where we recommit to writing or at least mentally taking note of the goals we want to accomplish this year. But I ask you and myself why? Don’t we make that goal to lose weight and then after a day or two of starving ourselves go back to eating the same old stuff? Don’t we write down a few goals only to lose the paper it was written on therefore annulling (at least in our mind) our agreement to work on those goals?

I am like many of you. I make goals and then a few days, weeks, or on occasion months go by and all of those goals are lost and gone. Then when the end of the year comes around I feel guilt and then vow to do my best for the next coming year. Not only are my lists of goals long and arduous but they end up being absolutely unreachable. Then I hem and haw when I can’t fulfill them and feel self pity.

As a teenager my dad had us all sit down on New Years Day and write down our goals for the New Year. One year my dad explained how we could literally write down the blessings we wanted that year and seal them in an envelope to read the following New Years. When I opened it there were many goals I didn’t even know I had written down.

I am a firm believer in writing down goals but through the years I have learned a few things, specifically when it comes to “New Years Resolutions.”

1 – I only write down 3 things that I want to see happen for that year. If you are more/less ambitious you can add or subtract to this list. I use 3 because I feel like they are things I can have a grasp on at all times.  I sit down with my spouse and together we create a list of 3 things we want to see happen. One year a goal included taking a vacation alone. After a lot of saving, planning and hard work we were able to go to Hawaii for 9 days alone! This was satisfying on a number of levels.

Another year one of my goals was to pay off a pesky debt. It literally took all year to do but by the end of the year we had paid it off. See that’s the thing about having 3 goals. Usually you’re able to wrap your head around them easier and to monitor them. My lists before of 20 plus goals were hard to manage and track. They rarely were accomplished which would explain the self pity and loathing. Another great thing about 3 goals is that they can last as long or as short as you need them to be. It could be something you do daily of something that will take you months to accomplish.

2 – I am a firm believer in writing your goals down and posting them everywhere as a reminder. Don’t do what I did as a teen and write it down, seal it in an envelope, and then open it up a year later. You will not remember what you put! Write it down in multiple places. On your calendar, in your phone, journal, computer saver screen, fridge, EVERYWHERE! Also make it look nice too so you don’t cringe every time you see it.

The more you look at it, the more brainpower you will use in order to accomplish it. I’m laughing inside because I am not an expert on any of this. In fact my expertise comes by failing so many times to accomplish what I wanted to that I had to come up with a system of how to actually achieve my goal. So you can take this advice for what it’s worth! Probably not much!

3 – Last the only way I’ve been able to achieve anything has been with the help of other people. No man is an island and when you are working toward a goal whether it is losing weight or learning a new talent you really need the help of other people to get you to acheive. I’m going to be selfish for a moment and give you a good example.  

I hate talking about weight – especially my weight. It’s always been a cause for concern because I’ve always fluctuated with each baby, holiday, and major life event. In October (and I’ll go in to detail in a separate post) I weighed more than ever before. I couldn’t quite get a grasp on it and felt listless. So my sister started a Biggest Loser contest. We all weighed in and made goals. I started off strong and found something I loved doing. Zumba! A lady in our neighborhood teaches the class and I was happy to be able to begin to love to work out.

Everyone who was doing the Biggest Loser dropped out within the first month but I decided to keep going. Thanks to a few friends who lived close they went with me to early morning classes and evening ones. It was fun when I was with them and it gave me the motivation to go. It’s been 2 1/2 months since then and I have lost 25 pounds! Although it is not my ultimate goal I am really happy with what I have accomplished thus far. I owe it all to my friends for motivating me and going with me to work out, and for my amazing teacher who pushes all of us in the class. Involving others to accomplish your goals will almost always give you success.

I hope that this was just fun and informative! I would love for everyone to feel good about the goals they make for 2011 and these are just a few strategies that have helped me achieve my own goals! What will your 3 things be for 2011?

Here’s to a Happy New Year!

Kattie

On the Twelfth Day of Christmas my true love gave to me never ending traditions

Can you believe that we've come to our last day? I'm sure you all finished up your holiday shopping and are now partying with your family. That's what we're doing anyway. I first want to thank you for letting me share my stories. I feel like I've had lots of support and that most of you have enjoyed the 12 Days of Christmas also. I hope that in writing them they have helped and inspired you. How grateful I am to have written them and remember all the details of so many Christmas's we have been blessed with.

I wanted to make this brief so that you can read and get on with your own holiday traditions. One of my favorite traditions is reading from Luke II. Every year we dress up and we take turns being different people in the Nativity. Since we have an abundance of animal costumes, this year my children will be the stable animals in the story. We'll see how that goes, but I hope that you all do some kind of tradition that brings you closer to Jesus Christ.

Whether it be reading from the Bible, reading stories, or watching a religious video I hope it helps you to remember the meaning of this time of year. I know I will never be able to repay Christ for what he did for me, but I know that in every act of service, kind deed, or kind words, we are taking one more step toward Him. I hope you've seen how the many people in my stories and life have demonstrated this. My love goes out to all of you and I wish you a very Merry Christmas!

On The Eleventh Day of Christmas my true love gave to me 11 presents for each child

When I was only 7 years old we lived in a small condo in California. My siblings and I occupied the master bedroom and my parents took a smaller bedroom off to the side of it. We were in a small space but we were all happy, healthy, and excited for the upcoming Christmas. We had a friend named Rosie who was the cool relative that wasn't related. She would come and bring us treats, take us out to eat, and buy us things. We were spoiled by her! She wasn't married at the time so she had lots of time for us.

The night before Christmas we were all getting excited and we couldn't wait to have Santa come. My mother told us that Rosie would be spending Christmas with us since she didn't have anyone to be with for the holidays. So Rosie came over and we were all terribly hyper jumping all over her. I wondered what she would give me for Christmas since she always knew exactly what I liked. We gave her hugs and then went off to bed anxious for morning to come.

The next morning we awoke and went downstairs. On each chair there was a GIANT plastic holiday garbage bag that looked like a chimney on the outside. It was tide at the top and on each bag there was a name. We ran to our bags and frantically ripped them open. There was a giant stack of presents for each of us, eleven if I remember right. We jumped up and down with excitement. My parents had their own sacks to filled with goodies.

Dress up clothes, Barbie's, Barbie's kitchen, a red dress, and much much more. I got things I never asked for nor dreamed I would receive. I was so excited and jumped wildly at the sight. Out of the corner of my eye I could see Rosie smiling widely as we would bring up every present and proudly show her what we had gotten from Santa.

After we were done I briefly wondered why Rosie had not given me a present for Christmas. Little did I know that Rosie had purchased all of the presents in those Santa sacks. She had given us much more than material stuff. She served us and has been a great example to me of selfless charity. Even though we've lost touch with her I hope someday to thank her for what she did for us.

On the Tenth Day of Christmas my true love gave to me 10pm at Target

It’s 10 pm and we are just arriving to our destination. I look around the car to see if we have everything. Sleeping bags – check. Flashlights – check. Food – check. Games – check. Any normal person would assume I would be talking about camping or a sleepover. In a way we’re doing that. We have just arrived at Target to gear up for what Black Friday will bring. We have our ads with big sharpie circles around them and money in our pockets.

We look and see other people sitting in their cars waiting for the moment when someone will emerge from their vehicle to be the first one in line. It’s a gamble. If you get out to soon then you have other perturbed customers who now have to exit their warm and comfortable vehicles to stand in line for 7 hours. No one is making their move so we gather up our belongings and head over to the front door of the store. Adults eye us as from their cars as we start to set up “camp.”

Then almost as quickly as we made our move, others start to do the same and now an empty line has turned in to a line of 20. I look around proud that we were the first to be up front. We were teens and really didn’t care what other people thought about us. Our spirits were high! Why shouldn’t they be? Earlier we had poured over the many ads and made our plans. My brother and sister and I would go to Target and my other siblings to Wal Mart.

My mother let us pick out our main gifts and then ran to an ATM to get us money. This was possibly the only day of the year where we could actually pick exactly what we wanted. We were old enough now to be more expensive and we couldn’t afford every day prices, but we could with Black Friday prices. So we planned out our routes and picked what we wanted. Now all we had to do was get them. That was the tricky part! To ensure a victory we had shown up in ample time for us to be at the front of the line so we could come out victorious.

We bundled up in our sleeping bags and we started to play card games. We laughed, told jokes, and drank hot coco and ate warm donuts. We didn’t even feel tired and we kept thinking ‘this isn’t so bad.’ But since we had arrived so early we had a lot of time to kill. I looked at my watch and it was only 1 am. 4 more hours I kept thinking. Our cheery dispositions were dampened over time and also by the snow that was now blowing at us.

Our moods took a turn for the worst when my brother knocked over the thermos of hot coco spilling it all over a blanket we were sitting on. Now we had nothing warm to drink nor did we have something warm to sit on. “Why did we decide to do this?” I said aloud. “I’m never doing this again.” Now it was around 2 am and more than 100 people were in line. People began to crowd in to our space and some literally stood above us.” I guess it’s time to go put all of our stuff in the car,” I directed.

My brother gathered our things and put them in the car while we held a small opening for him to get back into. By 3 am there were scores of people all waiting and buzzing about what was on their wish list. I had no intention to stand for 3 hours but knew if I moved my place would be taken quickly. Although it was a little bit claustrophobic the body heat from the other people did make it a little less freezing.

Now it is 15 minutes to 5 and people are literally starting to push. My siblings and I are smashed up against the door and our faces are pressed to the glass. “Remember,” I kept saying to them, “Josh you go get the games, and Jackie you go get the cart. I’ll get the stereos.” People were yelling similar directions to their own families and I was now feeling a sudden surge of adrenaline.

The doors blasted open and we almost toppled over each other. I found my footing and began to run while a man loudly said over a loud speaker “do not run.” I ran to the middle of the men’s aisle where the stereos were and literally threw my body over two boxes. People were grabbing at whatever they could find or get. I pushed the boxes farther from the chaos and sat on them until my sister arrived with the cart. Over a dozen people came to me and asked if I needed both stereos and I assured them I did.

When my sister showed up with the cart we put our things in it and went to find my brother. While my back was turned my sister said “hey that’s not yours.” I turned to see a woman trying to take a stereo out of our basket we were standing with. She dropped it, turned around, and walked away. Soon we were with my brother who had gotten everything else and we headed toward check out. We were the first people there and we paid for our stuff and walked out after entering the store just 10 minutes before.

In fact people were still walking quickly in but we were done. We got to the car and put our stuff in and began to already reminisce about our experience. Almost like a team winning a medal in the Olympics we patted each other on the back and were overcome with happiness. My brother exclaimed “this is the best day ever.” We were then received home by oohs and ahs over what we got. Despite how much I hated standing in line I was already thinking ahead to what we would do the next year for Black Friday.

I know it seems so superficial that we do this almost every year since I was a teen. I also know that people forget common courtesies when they’re put in these situations. I don’t support this at all and find that even now it’s better to shop online. What I do want to say is that all families have crazy traditions and fun stories to back them up. This is our tradition which has died over time, but we still re live those stories whenever Black Friday rolls around. 

On the Ninth Day of Christmas my true love gave to me 9 singing missionaries

I am homesick I kept thinking. I laid on the bed in the pitch black night fully clothed with a coat and a blanket over me. My feet had two pair of socks on them and I buried my head under the covers so my nose wouldn’t get icy. I peeked out a small window to see a few string of lights that were hung on a similar balcony across the way. I felt tired, cold, and terribly homesick. My mind wandered to all the wonderful things my family would be doing. They would be sitting around a gas stove sipping cider and listening to my brother play the guitar no doubt. They would be opening pajamas and then watching 24 hours of “A Christmas Story.” Not to mention all the delectable desserts and freshly baked rolls for their party.

I never thought I would succumb to jealousy but there I was hoping to be anywhere but there. It had not been all bad. During that month we had performed many Christmas concerts all over the city and even had our own Christmas party with food as close as we could get to a traditional American holiday dinner. I was spending my Christmas with people I had learned to love but for some reason I could not get over the feeling of dread as to what we would do all day.

I was a missionary in Spain and this was my first Christmas away from home. I wanted so badly to call my parents and say “hi, I miss you, come get me.” It wasn’t that I didn’t like my mission because I loved every minute of it. But the holidays were so difficult. I wanted to be with my family and friends to celebrate in the way that I always thought was best.

I fell asleep with anticipation and dread of the next day’s activities. Even though we had a free day until the afternoon we had no idea what we were going to do for that evening. No one wanted us around when they had family visiting or they were gone to their relative’s homes. No one would be in the streets to talk to and all of the shops would be closed. There was a reason that you spent the day with your family and we were forced to find refuge somewhere else for the night.

I awoke the next morning to go through our daily routine of reading, studying, and praying. My companion and I split up the chores and we spent time cleaning our apartment. Finally I sat down on the couch and let out a giant sigh. My parents had sent me a number of Christmas packages so I was more than excited to open my presents. It finally started to feel familiar as we exchanged gifts and sang some Christmas songs together.

Today was only 1 of 2 days during the year where we were allowed to call home and talk with our families for a half hour. It may seem harsh but it made talking to them all that much better when we finally did have the chance. Everyone had scheduled their times to speak to their families and because of the time difference I wouldn’t speak to them till later that night.

We came up with a few ideas of what we could do and decided to join the Elders to do some caroling. Music is such a powerful tool and I witnessed its influence on so many occasions and Christmas Day was no exception. My companion and I left to meet more missionaries to go and keep ourselves busy until the time we got to call our families.

We arrived at the subway stop we were meeting at and joined a flood of other missionaries which included my now husband Allan. That’s a whole other story! “What are we going to do?” I said. “We’re thinking of going to sing at the local hospital,” someone replied. So we walked to the hospital and chatted along the way.

When we arrived we asked an employee if we could just stand in the foyer and sing some Christmas songs. They were hesitant at first but reluctantly said yes. We had some really good singers and when we began to sing we had caught the attention of everyone there. People sat with their eyes closed and others walked up to us to listen and watch. All the emptiness I was feeling with being away from my family was replaced by music and an overwhelming sense of charity.

When we finished an employee came to us and asked if we would like to go and sing for some of the cancer patients in the pediatric unit. We readily agreed and followed them through a maze of halls until we found a brightly colored wing with toys that scattered the rooms. We quietly sang and walked through the halls while we stopped by rooms full of people. Kids looked up from their beds and parents held them tight as we sang and wished each a Feliz Navidad. We did this until it was time for us to go home.

I returned to the apartment ready for the “main event” which was my phone call home. I called home and had a wonderful time talking to my family. But when I think back to that Christmas what I remember most is how I felt singing to those children in the hospital. Music brings people together and in this case it brought me closer to people who were not my family but who temporarily took the place of my family. I am so grateful for the power of music and for what it can do for all of us. 

On the Eighth Day of Christmas my true love gave to me 8 ding dong ditches

When I was a kid we lived in Southern California. We loved living there because not only was it warm but we could see the firework show from Disneyland every night from our bedroom window. My parents worked very hard to provide for us. Yet no matter what our needs were we could always find someone who was worse off and needed immediate help and attention.

My father was over a small congregation at church. The congregation met in his native tongue which is Tongan. My mother and all of us kids did not speak any Tongan at all. Nevertheless we went to church weekly and listened to everything in a different language. I would like to say that we took advantage and learned to speak but we didn’t. We understand a lot more than we speak which is still true today. But when it’s not spoken in the home then it’s difficult to learn and my father was gone regularly.

To add to the chaos we housed two sets of missionaries that my mother was constantly helping. She cooked and cleaned up after them. She took them to appointments and helped with everything else. Those missionaries were incredibly lucky to be staying at our house! We loved having them because they played with us and read us stories at night.

I have so many fond memories of that house but there were a few memories that stand out above the rest. When my father was called to the congregation there was only a handful of active members and when we moved he had over 100 regular attendees. In that time he regularly assessed the needs of the congregation and what we could help with. My parents did not make a lot of money but have always given to those who needed it.

Right before Christmas my mother put together some beautiful Christmas baskets. It included candy, fruit, and baked goods to deliver to those who needed it most. They decided that we would leave it on the doorstep and ring the doorbell and run away. Ding dong ditching was a new concept to me. It was the first time I would be doing it and I wasn’t quite sure how to do it without getting caught. We had a fantastic time doing the first couple of houses and I felt I was getting the hang of it.

On the last house I came to I skipped up the driveway and to the door with a giant basket in hand. I wasn’t paying attention and I walked right up to the door and rang the doorbell. I didn’t realize that the door was open and only a screen stood between me and an older gentleman. Before I had the chance to run he looked at me and the basket and said in a loud voice “who is that basket from?” I stood very still and was not sure what to do. No one told me what to do if I got caught. I replied “umm nobody.”

He looked at me again and said “who sent you”? I was really panicking now still not sure what to say. I timidly replied “my dad.” I set the basket down cautiously expecting for him to yell at me but was surprised when he got up and walked toward the door. He opened the screen, picked up the basket, and then put his arm around me and squeezed me tight. I could feel his gratitude through that hug and it made me feel so good inside.

That Christmas was also just as memorable because we got Teddy Ruxpin for Christmas and in the very first hour of having it my brother took his stubby finger and stuck it in Teddy’s eye which made him break. Let’s just say that we cried a lot after that!

I’m so very grateful that even at a young age my parents included us when serving other people because it has had a lasting impression on me and my desire to serve. The experience of the ding dong ditching stands out and hopefully I can follow my parents example and teach my children at a young age that service can be fun and rewarding! 

On the Seventh Day of Christmas my true love gave to me 7 Niu's get Christmas

My family has been the recipient of many Christmas service donations. Growing up my parents had many mouths to feed and not enough money to go around. As kids we never knew how bad things were. We always had food on the table which led me to believe that there were never financial problems. Christmas time was always hard because of the money. It was okay if one child wanted a certain toy for Christmas, but you multiply that by 5 and that’s where it got expensive.

One night a few weeks before Christmas we had a knock on the door. My father opened the door to see our bishop (a.k.a. pastor) standing there with some things in his hand. He asked to speak to them privately and we all went upstairs intrigued as to what he could possibly want or say to them. After waiting my parents called us down and they gave us some cheerful news.

The bishop had brought over a brand new suit for my father and $500.00 cash. This was given to us by someone in our congregation that knew we were strapped for money and wanted to make our Christmas better. The bishop wouldn’t say who did this for us, but just said they wished to be remained anonymous and that they send their love to our family. My mother was crying and my father just looked at the suit beaming. Me being the one who wanted to know everything, I tried to gather many clues as to who may have been the culprit behind it all. I had my suspicions but in the end never really fully knew who had done such a selfless act.

My dad had been wearing the same suit for years now and his was tattered, torn, and outdated. The new suit was beautiful and fit my dad perfectly. My father held an array of callings that required his suit for visits, speaking engagements, and occasionally work. He and my mother were happy and I could tell that a giant weight had been lifted off their shoulders.

My parents then added “We know this money is for Christmas and we think you should use $100.00 to buy presents for each other.” Then we got really excited. What would we do with our money? At first I thought we could buy a huge group gift. Something like a pool table or ping pong table that we could all enjoy. We held a few pow wows in our room before we could make a definite decision. By a unanimous vote we decided we should use the money to buy Christmas gifts for my parents.

So the next week we all went to the mall to pick a gift for them. We split up into teams and my brother and I went to pick a warm coat for my dad (something else he desperately needed). My brother and I briefly argued about what kind of jacket would best be suited for him. At the same time my sisters went to pick out a makeup case and my mom’s favorite perfume; Chantilly Lace.

We excitedly took our packages home and wrapped them up. We hid them toward the back of the tree so they would be surprised when they found out there were things for them on Christmas morning.

Sure enough Christmas morning came and my parents watched thoughtfully as we took turns opening our own gifts. I really have no idea what I received but I do remember how surprised (or at least they acted that way), they were when they opened the gifts that we had bought them.  

I was so grateful for that person who let us have a wonderful Christmas, not only for us but also for my parents. I have always sworn that if one day I ever have even a little bit of means to help someone then I would pay it forward and do what someone else did for us. Because it’s not about what you get but what you give.

On the Sixth Day of Christmas my true love gave to me 6 times of snooping

I crept in to my parent’s bedroom and went straight in to the bathroom. No one could bother me in there if I locked the door and stayed quiet. My mom was notorious for hiding all of our Christmas presents in her bathroom closet. For as long as I can remember that closet has never been used what it was intended for. Instead it has held everything from presents to boxes to clothes to blankets. This Christmas was no different. In the past I had snooped under my parents’ bed, in their closets, and in the trunk of the car.

I wanted to know what I was getting way ahead of time so that I was assured I got what I wanted. If I thought it was something different then I would drop major hints. I’m sure it went something like this: “You know who says they like to rollerblade? Heather says she likes it, but I really don’t like it because it’s not very fun and you can’t go really fast. But you know what you can go fast on? Ice skates are really fun and go so fast. I’ve always wanted to be an ice skater.”

I know it sounds so pathetic but welcome to my life! I snooped every Christmas of my childhood. I even have gone as far as to unwrapping a gift, looking at it, and then re wrapping it. I think my mother caught on because then she started numbering the gifts and no one knew which number they were until Christmas Day.

So I snooped! It’s not a crime and people do it all the time. It was probably my 6^th year of snooping. The years past I knew exactly what I was getting down to the brittle and chocolate covered Santa. This year was not going to be any different. So I quietly swung the door open and began to quietly pull the plastic cover back. My eyes lit up as I saw an array of toys. My brother would get a remote control car, my sister was getting a Barbie, I made mental notes in my head as I dug my arms down deep in to the giant bag. It had to be there somewhere . . . oh yes there it was.

I shifted a bag to look at a bag beneath that contained a pink dress. I looked at the size and thought that it must be for my sister and then sitting below was a white pair of roller skates just my size. Roller skates I thought? I am too old for those. I fished my hand around and pulled out a pack of Christmas Lipsmackers and some new hair things. This was shaping up to be a very disappointing Christmas. It was only a week away and I did not like what I saw.

I thought I heard the stairs creak so I quickly shut the door and flushed the toilet just in case someone was coming. I ran out the door and walked to the hall where no one was. I was a little annoyed because I could have had more time to snoop in the shower where there were more presents “hidden.” Why did a parent not want me to peek when they were making it so easy for me to do so?

I planned other secret trips to the bathroom but as Christmas came closer, the less time I had to myself to go peek. I dropped major hints to my mom. I would say “mom I really want something for Christmas that I could use in this cold winter like a new coat or clothes.” Other times I would say “I really want a new boombox (yes I said it – this dates me!) or mom a new walkman would be cool. My mother would always just nod and say okay honey.

So even after all my snooping I still wasn’t positive what I was getting. I knew the roller skates were mine and a few other little things but that was it. Was I only getting 3 presents I thought? I know how horrible it sounds now but I expected a lot. But my worries grew with each day that crept closer to Christmas.

Finally the day came that we had all been waiting for. As tradition goes my brother wakes us up around 3 in the morning. My parents let us get up as early as we wanted to but we just can’t get them up until their ready! So my brother woke us up and we all ran downstairs to see the biggest shock I have ever had.

There sitting in front of each stocking was a brand new Huffy bike. How could this be? I gasped and ran down to look at it. Not only was I getting a bike but I was not getting roller skates! This threw me completely off guard. My siblings also gasped at the site of their own gifts. I have never been so happy or surprised on a Christmas morning before. As soon as daylight came I was outside riding my bike. My parents later revealed to me that they had been hiding all of our presents in a neighbor’s garage.

I would like to say that my snooping stopped there and I magically halted my evil ways, but alas I continued doing it all the way until I got married. I don’t know why but I have never snooped while I’ve been married. I think I’m so much happier that way. Because whether I wanted to admit it or not I look back to my favorite Christmas and it was the one where I didn’t know what I was getting.

If you have snoopers in your home try everything possible to keep the surprise from them because later they’ll end up thanking you for doing it . . . or at least you hope they will!

On the Fifth Day of Christmas my true love gave to me 5 siblings changed

What’s that one thing in your life that returns to your memory often? Maybe it even haunts you. It could be the birth of a baby, a move, a long trip, an act of kindness, or a death in the family. For me all of these come to mind when I think back to the Christmas of 1991.

My father had accepted a job at BYU and we were trading our sunny Californian lifestyle for a new life in Utah. I cried as we pulled away from the school I attended as I waved goodbye to friends who stood at the bus stop to watch me go. I didn’t want to move but that was not going to sway my parent’s decision. We packed our belongings and began to make the long drive to Utah. The trip was supposed to take 11 hours but when 5 small children and one pregnant woman are involved it takes a whole lot longer. It seemed like forever but we safely arrived and went straight to Ogden.

We stayed with my grandparents while arrangements were being made on the purchase of our home. Just weeks after arriving in Utah my mom gave birth to my sister Moriah Leilani Niu on September 26^th. It was a miraculous birth because the cord had been wrapped around her neck 3 times. We absolutely adored our new baby sister! To add to the excitement my parents were purchasing their very first home they had found in Springville.

I was so excited to have a home and especially to have my own room! Well sort of. My mom put the crib in my room so Moriah and I could share. We had a nice system going. At night when she would get up I would wake up and take the baby to my mom to feed her. I spent a lot of time with Moriah. Playing with her, feeding her, and talking to her while she lie in her crib. I absolutely loved her and felt she was my baby.

The weather turned cold and it was getting closer to Christmas time. We were all excited even though my parents knew that Christmas wouldn’t consist of much that year. They had put all of their money in to paying for a baby, a move, and a new house. On December 10 we knelt down to say a family prayer. Moriah lay in her car seat in the middle of us as we prayed. After that we smothered her with kisses and gave her hugs goodnight. Moriah had a small cold and so did my brother so my mother decided to put them in the same room that night so they could benefit from the humidifier.

Early the next morning when we awoke our sweet baby had died during the night. I’ll never forget that panic we all felt to find that she was no longer with us. As various policeman and paramedics poured in to our home that morning my mother asked me to keep all of the children downstairs with me. I took my siblings into the back bedroom and told them that we should pray that Moriah would be okay and that she would come back to life. I was only 10 years old at the time and I felt confident that God would listen and answer my prayer. I said the words aloud over and over again while we all cried. Then my father came down to give us the news that she had indeed died and that we needed to come and hold her for the last time.

We all cried and hugged and sang together. My father tried to explain death to us which we didn’t exactly grasp. We said goodbye to her as they carried her out in a large wicker basket which could have held a plant or baked goods, but it was holding my sister. Preparations were starting to be made and the mood was somber at best over the next few days.

We were in a new town where we new almost no one. But in that tragedy we made some of our greatest friends. From that day forward it was like we were instantly adopted by all of our new neighbors and by our congregation. We received an outpouring of food, gifts, and support. Neighbors watched us, people gave money to my parents to pay for a funeral, and they came and cleaned our house for the family that would arrive for the funeral. I’m not sure I can quite convey the feelings of gratitude that come when you feel so loved and cared for during such a tragedy.

Since Moriah had died so close to Christmas I don’t even think any of us remembered that our favorite holiday would be here in a few short weeks. We still didn’t have a Christmas tree up nor did we have any decorations. I vividly remember one night when there was a knock on the door. My dad opened the door to 5 or 6 BYU students who heartily shouted “Merry Christmas.” I ran down the stairs to see a giant Christmas tree and boxes in their hands. They walked in to our living room and began to set up the tree they had brought to us. A young girl pulled my mom aside and went through the boxes of gifts that they had for us.

I couldn’t believe my eyes! I was elated because it actually felt like things were normal for a few minutes and the realization of Christmas coming made me dizzy with excitement. These students showed us love and compassion and served us. They’ll never know how much that example meant to me because from then on I knew I wanted to be like them. It doesn’t take much to make a child happy. Just a plain old Christmas tree! Although we were still sad that we didn’t have Moriah with us for Christmas we had received so much from so many that we didn’t feel as hollow as we were the day she left us for another mission God had intended for her. 

On the Fourth Day of Christmas my True Love gave to me 4 days without luggage

When you’re in love sometimes you do stupid things. You think differently, you act differently, and it is obvious to everyone but yourself. I would like to say that I was never in gaga mode while I was engaged but my siblings and parents would vehemently say I was! I think anyone who saw Allan and I engaged know that we were head over heels. We made a lot of really stupid and silly decisions during that time. One of which I somewhat regret. It was to have our wedding the day after finals and a week before Christmas, December 18^th.

It seemed like the best time for a wedding but in reality I hadn’t realized that I was asking everyone to spend all of their time and money on a wedding right before the biggest holiday of the season. No I couldn’t see past that because all I cared about was my day. Our families were so gracious though and they went along with it. While planning our honeymoon we decided rather than go somewhere warm, let’s go on an adventure to New York City! We could just imagine the Christmas lights, skating in Central Park, seeing a Broadway play, and keeping warm in a posh hotel. So we booked ourselves a honeymoon!

Our wedding was a fairytale. Absolutely everything went off exactly how it should have. There were no problems, nothing broke, and everyone showed up to help us. It was almost too good to be true. So that’s why everything that could have gone wrong at our wedding went wrong with our honeymoon instead!

After spending our first night in a very ritzy hotel we spent the next day just relaxing and having fun until our flight departed. We arrived to the airport very early to give us some time to check in and go through security. But when we arrived it appeared that Allan had mistaken our take off time and we had missed the plane by a half hour. Allan was very upset with himself but I stayed calm and said it wasn’t a big deal. They charged us a small fee to change planes and instead we took the red eye to New York.

Allan’s a pretty big guy and when you put a 6’7 man in to a seat fit for a 5’5 person you have problems. The plane ride was nonstop but uncomfortable for Allan since he had nowhere to put his legs but in the middle of the aisle. The next morning we arrived in New York and were excited to have a fun honeymoon without anymore hiccups. We waited near the carousal for our bags as they were dropping down the chute. One by one passengers from our flight would step forward to retrieve their luggage and we waited for our turn. But soon the crowd was thinning and the conveyer began to slow and we still had no luggage.

We went directly to the office agent and stood in the back of a long line of people whom had also not received their luggage. After patiently waiting we got to the front and were told that our bags were put on a different plane, but not to worry because we would have them by that night. While Allan spoke to the agent I stepped out of the office and committed the cardinal sin of calling my mother on my honeymoon. “Mom they lost our luggage,” I said, “what are we going to do?” My mother being so positive said “Cheer up it’s not a big deal. You’ll get you’ll luggage. Just have fun!”

I guess I needed to hear that from her because my attitude changed . . . until we got outside. We were further delayed because all of our hotel and shuttle information had been packed in our suitcase. So a nice agent let us use her computer so we could print off all the addresses, phone numbers, and names we needed. We walked outside and a blast of ice cold air hit my face. How cold was it? Oh just in the 20’s. It was freezing and I was freezing. “Were not in Kansas anymore,” I muttered under my breath. We sat at the bus stop for another half hour before it came to get us.

Entering the bus was like slipping in to a hot bath after jumping in a cold river. It was that tingling shock to my nervous system. Up to this point we were mostly just annoyed with everything that had happened but now I just wanted to curl up and drape a snuggie over me. When we arrived to the hotel we were extremely tired and hungry. Our hotel was literally across the street from ground zero and our window faced directly over it. This was both depressing and cool. We spent the better part of the afternoon sleeping and ordering room service.

That night we still had not seen our luggage so we called the airline and they again promised us they would have it to our hotel in the morning. Foolishly I had packed everything in our bags . . . I mean everything. All the way down to my birth control pills. This made for a very awkward realization on Allan’s part. When it was realized he was the first to volunteer to take on the dark streets of the city in search of a convenient store for toiletries among other things.

We spent the next four days touring, walking around downtown, seeing Broadway musicals, shopping, and sipping carmel apple cider from Starbucks three times a day. We laughed about all of the crazy things that were happening to us.  And no, we still didn’t have our luggage! We would literally wash our clothes in the sink at night and then hang them out to dry every day. All of our pictures from our honeymoon look like they were taken on the same day because we were in the same clothes.

Finally on the last night before our departure our luggage arrived. Not only were their rips and tears on the outside but they had broken the wheels on the bottom of them which made it impossible for us to roll them as we walked. So the next morning we carried our heavy bags to the subway in order for us to get to the airport. When we arrived at the airport there was a horrible snow storm and we were delayed by an hour. The entire time on the plane we just prayed we would make our next flight.

We arrived in Minneapolis to much worse weather conditions. We barely made our plane but were held up on the tarmac for 3 hours. When it was finally our time to take off the pilots informed us that they had reached the amount of hours they were allotted to fly and that we would have to go back to the terminal and get off the plane. It was an almost laughable moment. Are you serious? I thought. Well needless to say we didn’t ever make it on another plane that night. Instead we slept on the floor huddled together on our jackets with hundreds of other passengers.

The next morning we took the first flight we could to anywhere but there. We ended up in Los Angeles and it was the day before Christmas. Have you ever seen a Christmas movie where someone is trying their hardest to make it home and yet everything just keeps going wrong? That was us all the way because now we were being told that we wouldn’t get a flight home until Christmas day. We were so fed up that we went to another airline and purchased two one way tickets home. Luckily everything went so smoothly with the last leg of the trip and we were just glad to be back in Utah.

In all of the wedding plans, honeymoon woes, and travel trouble I had completely forgotten to buy Allan a gift. Here we were our first Christmas together and I had nothing to give him. I entertained the thought of running to the store for about a minute but decided that sleep was more important.

The next morning we awoke and watched my family open their gifts. Allan had not purchased anything for me either which made me feel better because at least we were even. Then my mom suggested we open all of our wedding gifts. Suddenly I became giddy with excitement at the prospect of opening lots of gifts. I did have something to open! We walked upstairs to the family room where an entire room was filled to the brim with wedding presents. Allan and I immediately dug in and no kidding, 3 hours later we had finished. It was the best Christmas morning ever! We felt so blessed to have received so many beautiful things.

Needless to say that our first Christmas holiday together was not what we expected. We had a fantastic wedding, a catastrophic honeymoon, and a cheery Christmas morning despite not giving anything to each other. And the most important thing – we were able to laugh through it all! I took this as a good sign of things to come, and wouldn’t you know that the humor in our marriage has gotten us through so many difficult times. Make sure in your life you save room for laughter because after all, it is the best medicine.   

On the Third Day of Christmas my true love gave to me 3 strangers serviced

Super Secret Stranger Service Date Night. Alright now try and guess what this is. I bet you got it right. A whole date night dedicated to secret service you do for absolute strangers! Sound a little bit crazy? Well it is but it’s something I look forward to every year. The funny thing about it is how it spawned.

About two years ago Allan and I were trying to come up with ideas of service we could render to someone else during the holidays. We didn’t have a lot of time or money to spend but we wanted to do something special. Allan was in school full time and working full time. I was working a part time job and taking care of a new baby and toddler. Our schedules were hectic and Christmas crept closer and closer.

One of the only date nights we had planned was our 4^th anniversary Dec. 18^th. I was looking forward to it and I had just assumed that Allan had planned something special. But by no fault of Allan’s he had not planned anything or made any dinner reservations. So my sister came over to tend and Allan and I got in to our car only to say what should we do now? I was disappointed that we had nothing to do on our date.

After talking about all the possibilities of our night Allan had an idea of what we could do. He said that rather than spend the money on ourselves that we should do service for strangers. I was not on board with this idea. In fact I’m more of a leave it on the doorstep so no one sees me kind of a girl. I like doing service but I like even more when the person doesn’t have any clue where it came from. But Allan is all about doing it on the fly in front of them and seeing their reactions.

I will be the first to admit that I was more concerned with what I wanted to do rather than doing service. I felt entitled to having a good anniversary and this was not my idea of a pampering romantic experience that it should be. So with a bit of disappointment in me we left to find someone to serve.

That’s an interesting concept. How do you find someone who is in need of your help when you have no idea where you’re going or who to help? This is where your imagination kicks in. Allan suggested that first we stop at a gas station and fill up someone’s tank. 

So we pulled in to a 7-11 right close to student housing. We waited to launch our attack. We really wanted to scope someone out beforehand so that it would be easy to swipe our card and take off. Allan took the lead on this one because remember – I don’t like the giving confrontation. Although I did roll down the window so I could hear everything that was happening and could shout Merry Christmas as we rode out.

As fate would have it, a cute probably 19 year old pulled up her rusty car to the gas pump right next to us. She jumped out of her car and then Allan did the same. He went up to her and said “Can we buy your gas?” She looked over at me and I waved. She was extremely stunned and said “what?” Allan said again “we want to buy you gas.” She still looked confused and said “sure.” Allan then swiped his card and asked her what kind of gas it took and opened her gas cap. The young girl then said “this is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me.” Allan just turned and said “Have a Merry Christmas.” Then he jumped in the car and we waved as we sped off. This was not only fun but felt good.

Next we decided to head to the mall because surely there would be a lot of people there and we thought we could think of some way to give. Sure enough it was a busy night and there were shoppers everywhere. We decided that we needed to give something away. So we went to See’s Candy to purchase a box of delicious chocolates and a few candy items. As we were walking in the mall we saw a lady at a gift wrapping station. Allan came up with a brilliant idea!

We walked up to the kiosk and asked her how much it would be to wrap the chocolate box. She looked at it and said it would be $3.00. “Ok my husband said. Go ahead and wrap it.” She looked at the box and said “Oh these are my favorite chocolates. Whoever gets these is lucky! Is this for a party gift?” Allan and I immediately smiled at each other and said “yea, something like that.” She wrapped the chocolates in beautiful red paper while we made small talk. This was her second job she worked at night to make some extra Christmas money for her family. She taught at a High school during the day and she had a few teenagers. Then she finished the package and asked for the $3.00. We handed her the money and in return she handed us the box of chocolates. Allan looked at her and said “Merry Christmas, these are for you.” Allan then handed her back the chocolates. She gasped and said “what?” “These are for you and we want you to have a Merry Christmas” he said. Then we waved and quickly walked away. It was the exact reaction we had wanted.

The more we gave that night, the happier I became. I still wanted to have a romantic anniversary but the service we were doing trumped any dinner we could have had. Our night didn’t go perfectly mind you. A few words of advice if you ever want to give candy away: Make sure you don’t single a child out and then try to sneak it to him when his parent isn’t watching. Not only is this creepy but Allan got a confused stare when the father caught him doing it. I still chuckle about this.

Also don’t use the McDonald’s drive thru to buy someone else’s food. We pulled up to the drive thru and they asked what we wanted and we told them we didn’t want anything. We just were waiting for someone to pull up behind us so we could buy their food as a service. Then they informed us that they couldn’t permit us to do that because they are timed on how fast the order is taken, paid for, and when you leave, so if we stayed in the drive thru that would ding their numbers. I still can’t believe they told us that!

Instead we stopped by a Wendy’s and they obliged to let us wait however long we wanted in order to pay for someone else’s food. This was also fun because after we pulled out the car we had paid for pulled back around in to the drive thru after getting his food. We like to think that he was paying it forward to someone else.

This started off our tradition of Super Secret Stranger Service Date Night! This year we have involved other couples as a means to share the joy and raise the money to do more random acts of kindness. Whatever it might be in your own home I hope that you will start your own traditions of service and that you enjoy every minute of it. As I learned with my anniversary, it doesn’t always have to be about yourself in order for you to feel happiness, charity, and love. All it take is service.

On the Second Day of Christmas my true love gave to me 2 kids in an airport

Everyone who hates traveling during the holidays raise your hand! Even though I can’t see you I can see all of you putting your hands up. Some of you might be waving them in the air like you’re swatting at a fly. I will tell you that I feel your pain! I feel your delays, your layovers, your missing luggage, your packed flights, your long security lines, and your headaches.  I especially feel worse of all for those who travel with small children because I really believe that this is the worst! But if you were me two years ago you would actually find that it was a blessing in disguise.

Two years ago I had the most amazing experience with my children. My husband was going to school full time and working full time. I stayed home with our kids and was planning a trip in the fall to West Virginia to see my sister in law. It was close to the holidays and I was extremely nervous about taking a 9 month old and a 2 year old on a long plane trip.

The morning we were to leave I asked my husband to please pray that someone would help me with the kids. I was panicked that I would be “that” person whose kids screamed the entire trip and would kick other passenger’s seats the whole flight. We were to fly four hours the first leg and then change planes only to fly another 2 hours the last leg. How was I going to get two car seats, a stroller, and my purse and diaper bag on to the flight myself? I tried to prepare myself the best I could with being meticulous in my packing, organizing, and handling of our stuff.

We got through security smoothly and I was delighted that there was a small play area for my kids to play while we waited till the very last moment we would have to be to our terminal. Luckily I was able to board the plane early and the stewardess helped me with everything to our seats. Surprisingly my kids did amazing on the plane. They whined a little, slept a lot, and were entertained by a portable DVD player.

When we landed I stayed back and waited until almost everyone had exited the plane. Although I was sitting toward the front I knew I would need the extra time to get off. I saw a young man off to the side who had also waited until most everyone had left. He came up to me and asked if he could help me get all of my things off the plane. I was overcome with gratitude and readily accepted his offer. Once off the plane he said he would be glad to carry my car seats and things to the next terminal while I pushed my stroller with the kids in it.

As we walked we talked about ourselves. He was a BYU student who was flying out to an interview for medical school. His wife had just had a baby the month before and he said that if it were his wife in my situation he would have wanted someone to help her around the airport. We got to the terminal and I thanked him again for being so kind. A lady in her early 40’s who was sitting on a seat overheard me and turned to the young man and said “Don’t worry we’ll take care of her over here. She’ll get on the plane. I know how it is with young children.” I looked over to her and grinned because I really did believe that I would be helped.

The next flight was very rocky. There was no extra seat for Hayden to sit in so he sat on my lap while the plane swayed up and down. This was a much smaller plane with only 2 seats on either side but full to the brim with passengers. Mostly businessmen who were heading home after a very long day. It was almost 10pm and my enthusiasm had worn out. I was tired and in no mood to try to keep Hayden entertained. Mid way through the trip Hayden became very interested in a man sitting behind me. He would giggle, laugh and coo at him. I didn’t want to bother the man so I turned and smiled at him and half apologized for bothering him. He replied “I really don’t mind. He’s such a cute kid, and I have some of my own at home.” The man kept Hayden entertained for the rest of the flight much to my relief.

When passengers were getting up a woman complimented me on how patient I was and she said that I had done so well. That meant a great deal to me since I felt so fatigued. Once again I waited till most everyone was off the plane and then exited to retrieve my other car seat and stroller. To my surprise there were many other business men waiting to get their carryon’s which still had not been brought up from under the plane. When my things finally came I tried to pull my stroller open while holding my baby. While I was trying to do that my diaper bag fell off my shoulder which sent an array of toys, diapers, and formula all over the flow.

I paused and then exhaled loudly. I felt like I could burst in to tears at any moment and die of embarrassment. But as soon as it happened a man in a business suit asked if he could hold my baby. Then another scooped up all of the things that had fallen out of my bag. Then another opened up my stroller and put Jackson in. I was in shock to say the least. They were all so kind and helped me get me on my way or at least out of the jet way.

As I was strolling out one of the men who helped me walked closely aside me and started talking to me. “Where are you from?” he said. I replied “I’m from Utah. This is my first time here in Pittsburgh.” He said “Well let me show you how to get to baggage claim. This airport can be a little confusing.” As we walked we traded information about ourselves. He helped me on the subway that took us to baggage claim. He rode with me in the elevator while everyone else took the escalator. He asked me which bags were mine and then pulled them off the conveyor for me.

After all of this he offered me his cell phone so that I could call my sister in law to see where she was. “Don’t you have a bag to get?” I said. “No I travel light,” he replied pointing to his briefcase and rolling carry on. When it was time to say goodbye I turned to him and said “You know I told my husband to pray that someone would help me, and you have answered both of our prayers. Thank you so much.” With that I gave him a giant hug with tears filling my eyes. He turned a little pink and said “my wife has 2 children and I know she had to do the same thing with them when I was working. It was my pleasure.” We said goodbye and then my sister in law walked in to get me.

I think that I could go on for another page or two about my experiences on the way home and on our trip to my in laws for Thanksgiving. All I will say is that everywhere I went God put people in place to help me along the way. It restored something in me that said that there really are good people in the world. Most of the people who helped me were men which I found extremely surprising. I have been filled with gratitude for the wonderful people who are in the world and for the small differences and impacts they have made in my life. Whenever possible we have tried to pay if forward to another in need because that’s what this life is all about.

So while your traveling and worrying about your own holiday plans, keep an open mind and an open heart so that you may serve someone just as deservingly as I was.

On the first Day of Christmas my true love gave to me - A Tongan looking at his first tree!

I hope that all of you have met my parents at one time or another. I know I’m biased but they are the most selfless and giving people you will ever meet. They have helped and blessed so many people. My friends always loved coming to my home because as one friend said “it’s like your house is Disneyland.” There was constantly something going on and my parents were a part of every bit of it.

One of my favorite Christmas stories started with the two of them. It was their first Christmas together. For those of you who don’t know them I hope you get to meet them one day because they are truly amazing people. So let me start from the beginning.

My mother is from Utah and my father is from Tonga. Most of you know this but you may not know that they met at BYU Hawaii. My mom was young and cute and my dad had hair! My mom is still cute but my dad – well let’s just say we were pretty stressful kids. My dad had recently returned from his mission in Guam and spoke “broken English”, is what he says. We believe this because we constantly tease and accuse him of speaking “Tonglish.” It’s a weird mix of a Tongan accent with English words.

My mom was working in Hawaii for the summer and met my dad. My father took immediate interest to this beauty and they began to date. My mom had a really good feeling about him but her time in Hawaii ended and she went back to Utah. They wrote letters back and forth and my mom decided to write him a letter saying that she couldn’t do a long distant relationship. The day she went to mail the letter she received a call from my dad. She was shocked! It was the day before Christmas and my dad had called to tell her that he had moved to Utah and was staying at his brother’s home.

This was my father’s very first time on the “mainland” and he had never seen a Christmas tree or snow. My father grew up in a very humble home with his many siblings. Even though his parents were highly respected and were considered to be wealthy, they had very little possessions and Christmas was nothing like it is here. He would receive a half dollar and a small orange and apple. Occasionally when he really needed it, he would get a shirt or a pair of shoes, but most of the time it was just a small piece of candy and the fruit. Nevertheless he was always grateful and looked forward to Christmas when he would get a few things.

My mother was excited that he was there and invited him to spend Christmas with her and her family. My grandparents scrambled to put together some presents for my dad so that he would be able to open gifts with everyone else in the family.

Christmas morning came and my dad recounts that he was enjoying himself watching my mother and her sister opening presents that they had given to one another. My grandma then pulled out a gift and handed it to my father. My dad took the gift with a surprised look on his face. He had not expected to get anything. He opened up the gift that was a red Christmas tie. Tears filled his eyes as he stared at it. He had never been given a gift like this before. The next gift he opened was a can of Almond Roca (which my grandmother gave everyone at Christmas time). Again my father became emotional at the gift.

Everyone was moved at the sight of my father opening gifts and being truly grateful no matter how big or small. My aunt Julie said that she couldn’t believe something like a tin of candy could make someone so happy and humbled to receive it. This was the biggest Christmas he had in his entire life. That’s hard to believe since most of us would have complained had we been given so little.

Both my parents tell us this story as a reminder that it doesn’t matter what the quantity or even the quality of the present is, we should always be grateful for what we are given and we should demonstrate our gratitude and love for those who give it.